This will be my last post until I get my act together and write in my regular paper journal. That is much more cathartic for me because I don't think, I just write....
I am not going to allow myself to blog until I have a good topic in my journal journal. I have made other rules for myself, mainly to help me get back to a good place where I know who I am.
I am reading a book by a woman with CF who has had 2 double lung transplants. She is so wise, and I know she's more than 10 years older than I am currently - but her wisdom is what I crave. I know writing in my personal unpublished journals will help me get there.
(by the way, her name is Tiffany Christensen and her website is www.sickgirlspeaks.com)
I think I have figured out why I have stopped writing in my personal journal recently: I am afraid of what my mother will find when I am gone. I have never hidden my journals - and I'm surprised she hasn't read them before. But I don't want to self-censor, so I'm going back to saying whatever I need to say.
Hopefully this process will lead to better blog entries and then better book essays and someday I will finish my book and either find a publisher or self-publish (I'd rather not do the 2nd, but I'd rather not do a book tour... I just wrote a VERY long email to my friends about what it would be like to travel with me over spring break, and I don't know if I'm willing to travel that much for a book. Plus there's the whole... nevermind, I won't talk about the government here).
So goodbye for now (it may be tomorrow when a really good idea strikes me, but I don't know).
This is for the good of the blog, the book, and the babe who writes it all!
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